Wordless Wednesday....New Uniforms, Two Performances, and 97 Degree Heat!

A new goal (and runner's legs too)....

I'll be the first one to admit that I hate structured exercise.  I've always been the type that would rather get my exercise from working in my garden or trekking a few miles to a beautiful beach where I could sit in a chair and sip a cocktail or two.  I'll also be the first one to admit that when I don't exercise regularly, I am completely and utterly out of shape.  I can go from being toned, fit, and full of energy to a flabby "bum" in a matter of weeks.  This is the case now.  I'm a flabby "bum".  I've mentioned in earlier posts that I injured my back in early spring.  It actually started in February and continued through June.  Since then I've had a couple of small flares up that were as painful.....but luckily, lasted for a much shorter period of time.  Regardless, I went from going to the gym four to five times per week to nothing.  I went from working out on an elliptical machine for an hour at a time and spending quality time on the weight machines to barely being able to walk.  I felt great and then......was in the most excruciating pain I've ever felt.  Since then, I've been too afraid to do anything.  Especially exercise.   

The doctor suggested I get back into the game.  He advised to stay off the elliptical.  Evidently, its a back breaker.  He said walking or running would be a great way to make my back stronger and if I did it slowly enough, I would prevent injury.  So here I am....contemplating running.  Its just something that I've never even considered for exercise.  I don't know why since I've always been envious of runners.  I've always wanted runner's legs.  I've always wanted runner's stamina.  And since I know so many people who run, I've always wanted to know what it was that made them crave it.  My brother runs every day.  My sister in-law runs every day.  I know several people at work who run......every day!  And everyone I talk to about it loves it.  They also tell me the truth.....that until I establish my pace and ability, I will most likely hate it.  But if I stick too it, I will love it entirely.  So here I am....contemplating running. 

I knew I had an old copy of "The Beginning Runner's Handbook" on my library bookshelf that I had read but never followed.  It's a 13 week walking/running program where you work yourself into running.  You are only required to do three sessions per week, with each week increasing your running time.  By the end of the 13 weeks, you should be able to run for an hour or complete a 5K.  I am now on my first week.  And it feels GOOD!  No back pain and more energy already.  Really!  So here I am....contemplating running!

Book or Nook?

Technology.  I have to admit that I have a love/hate relationship with most of technology.  Computers, printers, iPods, copy machines, fax machines, DVD players, digital cameras, smart phones....I love that I have them in my life, but hate that I don't know how to use them to their fullest capacity.  There are times when I definitely think they are smarter than me.  And Good Lord....if something goes wrong with any of them, the best I can do is shut it down and turn it back on....and hope among hopes that it will work without any issues once it boots back up....

Even so....even though I have this love/hate relationship with technology, I love getting new gadgets.  After all, they are convenient.  However, this is also why I am in a dilemma now.  You see....not long ago, my parents decided to buy electronic books for themselves.  My mother went online, researched the different name brands, and decided that they would like "The Nook" by Barnes & Noble the best.  An eBook that has 3G wireless and can hold up to 1500 books.  Amazing, huh?  So, once they brought them home, I balked and said "I WILL ONLY READ A REAL BOOK"! But....I also ran right over to their house, so I could inspect the eBook with great detail.  I must say....I'm quite impressed.   And truly amazed.  It's very very cool.  Amazing. 

Here's the thing....I love to read.  I love to read for knowledge.  I love to read for pleasure.  I love to read anytime.  I would rather read a book than watch television any day.   The dilemma I have is that even though this eBook is amazing (have I said this already), there is just something about holding a real book in your hands, feeling the spine of the book on your fingers, and turning that page.  I love to see the ink of the print.  I love a hard backed book or a soft cover.  I love everything about a book.  And that is part of reading that I love.  That is part of reading that makes me feel like I'm involved in the story.  It's still a book in my hands.  And I worry that if I break down and indulge myself with technology, I will be without that book in my hands, and it won't be the same.  So....I continue to ask myself....Book or Nook?

More Cowbell...

Sometimes you have weeks when life just needs more cowbell.  This has been one of them.....I'm looking forward to a great weekend of family, friends, band competitions, and a very special birthday!  Woo Hoo...its Friday!

Compromise....

When Jon and I started dating we lived in two separate cities about an hour and a half apart. We realized then that if we liked each other enough we would have to make some compromises. So….we took turns. One weekend at my place, the next weekend at his. When things became a little more serious and we wanted to see each other more often than weekends, he would come to my city on a weekday and the next week I would travel to his town during the middle of the week. Compromise.  The one thing I've learned in the almost 14 years together is that he and I, both, are constantly making compromises for each other.  I don't say this with negativity.  Instead, I say it with pride.  I feel certain that compromise is one of the reasons we work so well together.   We love each other enough to realize what is more important to each of us individually and to realize what is most important to us both....as a married couple.  Over the years we've made many compromises.....

• Do we keep the television on all night long like he prefers or do we keep the room dark and quiet like I want it?  Yes....to both.  We do keep it on, but with no volume and if the light bothers me, I can always wear an eye-mask like Eva Gabor did on Green Acres.
• Did we move back to Columbia because I was homesick for friends, family, and shopping near by?  Yes....even though Jon thought living in Beaufort was the 'bees knees' and he was in absolute fishing heaven.
• Does Jon let me rearrange the furniture every other month?  Yes....even though he bumps into things or has to sit "crooked" in his chair until I move it again.
• Do we eat at the table every night like I prefer or do we sit in front of the television while we eat?  In front of the television....because he likes TV trays and I've learned it gives me a chance to catch up with my favorite shows on the DVR.
• Do we have a zillion flowers in the yard?  Yes....because even though I hate to water them, I love to look at them.  And....Jon loves me enough to water them for me.
• Do we argue over cleaning the house or how to do chores?  No...because we split up responsibilities and we both know that we have to do them or else.  Or else...they just don't get done.
• Does Jon let me paint the rooms of our house like a crayon box....even though some of the colors have made us both want to scream, pull our hair out, or puke?  Yes....because he wants me to be happy making our house a home and he knows I'll re-paint again soon.
• Does it drive me nuts that his dirty clothes rarely make it all of the way into the basket?  Yes...but I pick them up anyway, because I'd rather have them hanging over the side of the basket or laying on the floor than not have them at all.

As you can see...most of the things that I mentioned above are small and simple things.  The little stuff.  But that's the beauty of it....those small and simple things help us to communicate, have taught us to listen, and give us the ability to never take each other for granted.  Its because of these small compromises in our life, that make it easy to deal with the big issues.  And we do so very well....we resolve the big things together!

Now, most of you who know me, know that I am very opinionated, stubborn, and have the knack of sticking my foot in my mouth.  So....I try to take the things I've learned from the successful compromises Jon and I make in our marriage into the other relationships that I have in my life.  I'll be honest, sometimes its hard....I cannot communicate as well with some other people.  But - through my lessons of compromise -that's when I step back and try to see the other person's point of view.  And then I compromise. 

It makes all the difference in the world....

Wordless Wednesday....

Married....with NO children...

disclaimer:  this post is not directed at anyone in particular or meant to cause anger or hurtful feelings; if you feel you cannot read without assuming that I'm talking about you personally....then please read at your own risk



Sometimes I feel like I’m Hester Prynne.  You know, the woman with the scarlet letter.  No, no, no....I am no way an adulterer.  Not at all….but, in a way, I have been branded.  I wear the letter "C".   The reason for my scarlet letter…. I’m over the age of 40, married, and childless.  Bless my heart....that’s right….I said CHILDLESS.  Some people assume I just don’t like children.  Some people probably think I’m just selfish or self involved.  And, worst of all,  some people just look at me sadly; like I'm missing some great secret of the world.  Now, unfortunately because of these assumptions, I do think I get treated differently by a number of people.  People I don't know.   People I  do know.   People I know well.   People I know well that have children….

It was not always in my plan to become an adult, get married, and to remain childless.  In fact, my mother tells me that when I was a young girl and people would ask me what I wanted to do when I grew up I would say…."have lots of babies and live at home with my mom and daddy".   Now, I’m certain my parents are happy that it didn’t turn out that way….especially since I never mentioned a husband at that time. Anyhow….I regress.

You see….there was a time after Jon and I got married that we didn’t take precautions for not getting pregnant.  We believed if it happened….great!  And, if it didn’t happen….great!  We didn’t want to plan anything and we certainly were not one of those couples that had a “roadmap” for having a child.  We did not think about it constantly.   If it was meant to be it would be.   However, it just didn’t happen. It just wasn’t something that was in our life’s plan….God's will....whatever you chose to call it.   We are okay with that.   Jon and I both feel secure in who we are and how much we love each other….without having children in our lives.  In fact, there are times when I’m thankful that I am not raising a child in our society and culture. It’s always other people that don’t understand why we seem so content….they think its tragic. 

An effect of that and the part of not having a child that makes me feel like I’m sometimes wearing the scarlet letter of childlessness is that it does isolate us from couples – and friends - who do have children.   I sense that some people think that Jon and I "shun" the idea of hanging out with them if their children are around.  Or attending functions with couples and children.  Family affairs.   It is a truthful statement to say that Jon and I rarely get invited to the family type BBQ’s or kid friendly parties.  Instead, we are the couple that “parties”…. the people to call if you want to get wild and crazy.  Or so everyone thinks.   So.....because of this, we get invited to the rare nights out on the town, drinking festivals, or the kid-free events only.   Now, granted, we do like to do those things too.   I think our reputations in our college years (and many years after) proceed us both in this aspect.   But now....rarely do we "party".   The reality of it all is that we lead a pretty laid back lifestyle.  And we like it.  And we like to be around our friends!  We like who our friends are...children and all! 

I do feel blessed that we have many children in our life through Jon's band programs, my nephews, and our friends who aren't afraid to expose their children to the Brady's.  And I know that children like us.  We still have many former band students that remain in our lives now - as adults - because we knew them as children.  It's usually our peers - people our age or older - who question our ability to socialize with children.  Unfortunately, its a horrible  stigma to bear....a scarlet letter of sorts....my letter "C"....and food for thought for those of you who don't understand.

Let them eat cake....

Why is it that every job I've ever had employs folks who love to eat? Is it really just because everyone loves to share quality time with their co-workers and food is a way to do that?  Or...is it simply because we Americans love to eat?  Either way, I'm usually pretty good about letting my willpower kick in and I am  able to decline - with ease - the Friday morning breakfast run or the call for having lunch delivered, but never (and I do mean NEVER) have I been able to resist "the cake".  I don't know what it is about the cake....that fluffy cake with lots and lots of fluffy icing.....that's when my willpower goes to pot!

The problem is that there is always cake.  Birthdays, marriages, babies, holidays, promotions, retirements, hirings, firings, any 'ole random day....co-workers always feel these are all valid reasons to have "the cake".  The bottom line is that I've never said no to the cake.  I decided last week - after eating a huge piece of cake that had white and purple flowers and lots and lots of fluffy icing - that I wasn't going to do this anymore....NO MORE CAKE FOR ME! 

My only worry is this....can I really say no to "the cake"?  For those of you that watched "SEINFELD", think back to the episode where Elaine is confronted with cake from two separate celebrations at her workplace. Unlike me with the breakdown in willpower, she is tired of the forced socializing. So....she decides to boycott "the cake" by calling in sick the next day.  Upon her return, her coworkers give her a cake to celebrate her return to work from being sick! It is at this point she loses it and refuses to take part in any future celebrations.  A few days later Elaine misses the 4 o'clock sugar rush that she had gotten used to from all the celebrations, so she decides to raid her boss, Peterman's, refrigerator, where she finds a piece of cake.  Because she's eaten a large piece out of the cake, she tries to even it out, but gets swept up in the moment and finishes it off.  She later finds out from Peterman that the piece of cake he had in his refrigerator is worth $29,000 because of its historical significance.  When it comes to "the cake", this would be my luck....

Simple Woman Daybook....on a Friday

Outside My Window....there is a fall feeling in the air. Mornings are 'crisp and cool', but afternoons are downright hot! Looking forward to the perfect day of cool mornings, warm days, cold nights...

I am thinking....I really need to get back to the gym. Ever since I hurt my back in the spring, I've become a lump! And its no excuse....I know what's good for me - I just don't always do what's good for me...

I am thankful....that I have such an amazing family. Its nice to come home to such a wonderful, secure, and happy place...

Someone who made me happy....Ted. He is an amazing little dog. I've never seen an animal that actually tries to hug you....sincerely....every time you come home...

How I made someone happy....Jon. His 40th birthday is coming September 25th (and for those of you who didn't know - YES - I robbed the cradle!). Anyway....knowing he couldn't have a party due to a band competition that day, I let him pick out a new fishing rod and some fishing lures from Tackle Warehouse. I'm still deviously planning some other things......he he he ha ha ha! I mean it is the BIG 4-0!

I am going....to the Riverbanks Zoo Daylily Sale tomorrow morning with my in-laws. Not only do I plan on indulging on flowers, but I'm really excited about visiting with my family from Charleston...

I am hoping and praying....for my friends and past-colleagues who are out of work right now. Its time to get this country up and ALL of us working again...

On my mind....Marching Band! I am really excited to see the Dutch Fork Silver Spirit Band's show next week. It always amazes me how it just seems to come together when its time to. Not only is the show amazing, but they will be premiering new uniforms and instruments too! GO DFHS SILVER SPIRIT BAND!

From the yard....it is truly the dog days of summer. Everything looks so TIRED. In the next few weeks, I do plan to spend some evenings cutting some things back and getting things cleaned up and ready for Fall/Winter...

Around the house....Have several projects looming. For one, I want to redo the Master Bathroom. Although its been painted and has lovely window treatments, I'm still not happy. I think I'm going from bright turquoise and browns to a more subdued tans and whites. I want a relaxing, embalming spa feeling....aaahhhh...

I am reading....As noted in my previous blog entry I am currently reading "Eat, Pray, Love" By Elizabeth Gilbert - an exceptional memoir....

Pondering these words...."It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection." ~ Bhagavad Gita

Off the Bookshelf....

I love to read. There is nothing like a good book in your hands and a story that you can't tear yourself away from. At the moment, I am reading "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert.

I know....I know. For someone who loves to read, why am I just now reading this book? A New York Times Best Seller? An Oprah Book Club book? A "Now seen in Theaters" book? Well, believe you me, I saw it on the shelves in all the book stores I frequent, but for some reason the word PRAY in the title was throwing me off. Not that I don't pray. I just assumed that I wouldn't care for it because of the portion of the book that was geared as more spiritual than I'm accustomed to reading. Not that I'm not spiritual. I just didn't know how I would feel about it. Anyway, it just goes to show you....I didn't peak a real interest in the book until the movie trailers started playing....and it was then I decided - as I always do - that I wanted to read the book before I saw the movie. And I'm so glad I did.....

The book is a true memoir about and by Elizabeth Gilbert. Recently divorced, she decides to travel across the world to Italy, India, and Indonesia in her personal search for.....well, EVERYTHING! She writes "I wanted to explore one aspect of myself set against the backdrop of each country, in a place that has traditionally done that one thing very well". She continued in writing "I wanted to explore the art of pleasure in Italy, the art of devotion in India and, in Indonesia, the art of balancing the two."

At this blog entry, I have only read half of the book.....all of the EAT section.....and half of the PRAY section. I can totally relate to the EATING part. Oh, what we wouldn't give to spend months in Italy eating...and eating...and eating. Carbs....what carbs?

And.....believe it or not, I am gaining a lot of insight from the PRAY section. Honestly. Its made me think about my own spirituality and how it relates to how I live my life. How I feel about others and how I feel about myself. And its made me realize that you don't always have to be in control. Its okay to let go.

The pleasant surprise of the book is that I've found that even though the author and I are profoundly different, we are so much alike. So much that it's scary. We both have control issues (yes....I can admit this) and we both have an over active mind. Even though I haven't finished "Eat, Pray, Love", I would recommend reading this book for the first portion alone - when I say portion, I'm meaning the EATING portion(s)! Anyway, I find the memoir extremely compelling. The honesty of the author is admirable and touching. It makes me wish that I could experience a trip such as this....only to find.....well....of course, PASTA!

Wordless Wednesday...

Rush, Rush, Rush....

I'm not sure if its because I'm getting older or because I'm becoming more apathetic to meetings, appointments, and deadlines, but I have recently discovered that every time I hit the road, other people are always rushing around like they are on fire. And worse than ever....they are tailgating. Now granted, I switched from driving an SUV to a small sports car in the last few years and I do get a totally different experience because of it. It can be very intimidating when a huge SUV comes barrelling up on your rear end. And I have to ask myself......WAS I THAT OBNOXIOUS AS A SUV DRIVER? Really. I don't get it. I've found that both men and women who drive SUV's are equally at fault when it comes to terrorizing small cars. And just as obnoxious. Just recently, I pulled out of my neighborhood by taking a right into a 35 mph zone. When I initially pulled out, there was no traffic coming from the left at all. Not one car could be seen down the good stretch of road. Then.....MAGICALLY (and at a rate of speed of approximately 50mph)....right on my tail was a HUGE Ford Expedition who obviously wanted me to go faster than the 35 mph speed limit. But I didn't. And she got closer. By the time we got to the stop-light, I couldn't even see her headlights in my rear view mirror. So...was there an emergency? Was she late for church? Was she a "hitman" out to get me? WHY WHY WHY was she following me so closely? When the light changed, we proceeded up the hill, with her continuing to push me along. I knew she was just dying to give me a little tap. We finally got to the next stop-light where there was a split in the road with two lanes going straight. That's when she pulled up beside me, unrolled her window, and proceeded to curse me out for going too slow. Really...can you believe the nerve of her? And on a Sunday morning, to boot? Now....I do not condone "road rage" in any way. But I did respond by politely rolling down my window, smiling at her, and waving. My special wave. So the moral of this story is....YOU PEOPLE NEED TO SLOW DOWN! Enjoy life a little more, take in the beauty of the day, and most importantly.....get off my ass! Its obnoxious and frightening....and just down right rude......

Always Remember....

I'll never forget how I felt 9 years ago today when our country was attacked on a beautiful fall day. I had just recently started a new job at the Bursars office at the University of South Carolina. A coworker came into my office and asked if I could pull up the Internet because she had just heard on the radio that the World Trade Center had been hit by a plane. Instead, we went down the hall to an office where a television was located. It was true. As we stood there and watched as the second building was hit and as the buildings fell, and witnessed the news coverage that a third plane had hit the Pentagon in Washington DC, it came over us all that no students had come into the office. None. An office that is usually bustling with activity in September. It was the most eerie feeling in the world. We eventually all went back to work - quiet and solemn - caring to each others fears and sadness. All making phone calls to check on our loved ones and friends. Scared of what might happen next. It was truly one of the longest days of my life. That night, I remember Jon and myself sitting on the couch together, watching the news, and holding each other. Thankful that we were okay, but terrified and sad for the thousands of families that were touched by this. So, as we go about our lives this September 11th.....REMEMBER. Remember September 11, 2001. Remember that we are free....free to go to college football games, to shop at the mall, to grill out and enjoy the beautiful day. But most of all, remember that we are free to love our families. Free because we are the United States of America.

It's that Time of Year...

Everyone who knows me knows that my husband, Jon, is a band director. And if you know me really well, you know that near the end of July or the beginning of August each year...well.... BAND SEASON starts in my house. This means that Jon will spend almost a month straight preparing and conducting leadership camp, rookie camp, and full band camp with 100+ students and a large number of staff. Then school starts, and weekly practice/rehearsal starts, and football Friday's starts....and most importantly the competition band season starts. The meaning of this is that he's gone....long gone. This self-proclaimed "man of leisure" becomes a 40 to 60 (and sometimes more) hour per week band director. And it gives me a lot of alone time. Since I knew what profession I was marrying into, I'm not complaining....I'm just saying! I rarely attend a practice due to my work schedule and I chose to forgo the football games since Friday is a great night to get things accomplished at home. But.....I do chose to travel with him and the band to every competition. I enjoy watching him work, watching the kids progress, and I love watching them succeed. Our favorite thing to say to each other after they've won is "winning feels much better than losing". You see....Jon and I have been together MANY years and I've been to MANY band competitions and I've seen his bands come in last....I've seen them win everything....and I've seen them come in second when everyone else knew they deserved to win! However...there is nothing like seeing the smiles on the kids faces, the pride in their eyes, and the relief that it's over when they do WIN! It is truly priceless....

Needless to say....BAND SEASON has started in our house. As much as I miss him when he's gone, I'm really looking forward to travelling with him and the band and making band a part of my schedule again! I will keep you posted on the outcome of their performances....I believe this will be a year of SUCCESS!

Wordless (or a few words) Wednesday.....

Some of our beautiful flowers that bloomed this spring and summer in our ever changing gardening plan. Of course, the daylilies are still our favorites!

Has it Really Been this Long?

I bet everyone who ever followed my blog has decided that I've quit, given up, got worn out.....or just forgotten about you, right? Well, no...not really...never! I can only say that life has truly gotten in the way. After the new year began this year, it seemed that every aspect of my life went into full speed. Right after I returned from my holiday break, I encountered the busiest time of the year for my job....and in the midst of all this chaos, I encountered an offer for a new job that I couldn't refuse. That's right folks....I accepted a new position that I began February 1st. I thought when accepting the position that I was going to have more time for "ME" and for writing, gardening, and doing the things I enjoy most. Truth of the matter is that this was the point that life became even busier. Hectic. Nuts. Crazy. So busy that the last seven months have been a whirl wind. It's been like snapping my fingers. It's been exhausting. And...in the last few weeks I've been doing some soul searching...lots of soul searching. It just seems like something was missing. I told Jon about these feelings and told him I was thinking of taking a class...or learning a new language...or getting back into my exercise routine full time (which I plan to eventually do - regardless). Anyway, I was trying desperately to find what it was that was lacking...and then it came to me last night while I lay in bed....soul searching. TA DAH! I wanted to start blogging again...to really write and motivate myself to write often. And hopefully motivate myself to write my book. So here I am. All day long I've been thinking about the format I will be using and I've come up with several versions of how the new and improved "Hissy Fit" will flow. I'm still not quite there yet, but once decided....I will let you, my faithful readers, know as well. Anyway, it feels good to be back....real real good. Look for me often....I'll be right here!